Happy Birthday, LiLo

lindsay lohan bday 280609

Lindsay Lohan turns 23 today. And based on this recent photo, I wish her these things for her special day:

  • First and foremost, I wish Lindsay a style change so that she no longer looks like a trailer park slut on vacation at Myrtle Beach.
  • I wish Lindsay some stability in her life, and friends who genuinely care about her, and aren’t just in it for themselves.
  • I wish Lindsay the self-esteem to realize she deserves more than this.
  • I wish Lindsay the soundness of mind to return to work so that she can make the most of her acting talent.
  • I wish Lindsay a weekend in the loving, motherly embrace of BAngieB, who’d certainly soothe and protect her pretty, pretty girl.
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6 responses to “Happy Birthday, LiLo

  1. Hilarious post!!!
    I join you to wish her all that! She does need it! 🙂

  2. If she only knew how much good can come of a month in Cat’s lesbian basement, cookouts in the backyard, wonky pups, and hashbrown casserole…

  3. I haven’t been here in so long! I am such a dummy!
    Lilo should totally go to the basement, by force if necessary!

  4. That’s the big problem-everyone is in it for themselves and don’t really care about if LiLo gets clean because the gravy train makes more money if she’s seen as crazy. God, people are gross.

  5. i wish for someone to take away her phone so she can stop tweeting!

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